[MADtv] Coach Hines

[Miss Information]

• Ike Barinholtz ... Lankenstein, DeShazer (4 appearances/ 2 Appearances)
  
  Matt Braunger ... Careco (3 Appearances)
  
  Frank Caeti ... Tommy Hackenjos (3 appearances)
  
  Keegan-Michael Key ... Sandoval "Coach" Hines/Heinz (18 appearances)
  
  Bobby Lee ... Joseph/ Terry Yaminashi (13 appearances)
  
  Jordan Peele ... LaPrince (3 appearances)
  
  Eric Price ... Darnell (3 Appearances)
  
  Johnny Sanchez ... Morales (2 Appearances)
  
  
  
  Biography
  
  Keegan-Michael Key plays Coach Hines, full name Sandoval "Sandy" Hines, a bald, energetic, gum-chewing gym coach who can often be found yelling creatively worded threats at his students. Bobby Lee often played Joseph/Terry "Yaminashi" Yaminashi, a student who who particularly drove Hines crazy. In Coach Hines's final appearance in episode 1416, it is discovered that Coach Hines is an heir to the Heinz Ketchup family fortune, and that he "never needed the money". So he changed his name to "Hines" so he could fit in better, get his athletics degree and start coaching. Coach Hines's goal in coaching was to have one student do the right thing one time and in the final sketch, when Yaminashi admits that he made up Coach Hines injuring him in a way so he could get the insurance money, Coach Hines considers his job done.
  
  
  Sketches
  
  923 Coach Hines: Inappropriate Assembly Behavior (Without Joseph, Careco, Tommy, DeShazer, LaPrince, Morales or Darnell)
  Coach Hines lectures a gym full of students on how to behave during an assembly.
  
  1002 Coach Hines: Funeral (Without Joseph, Careco, Tommy, DeShazer, LaPrince, Morales, or Darnell) (Nicole- Sister Divitz)
  Coach Hines angers Principal Lankenstein at the funeral of one of St. Francis's nuns.
  
  1019 Coach Hines: Career Day (Without Joseph, Careco, Tommy, DeShazer, LaPrince, Morales, or Darnell) (Paul- Sister Mary, Ron- Ken Vandenberg, Jordan- Pat Slaterty, Bobby- Dr. George Sumlo)
  Coach Hines interrupts Career Day by screaming at all of the students.
  
  1020 Coach Hines: Basketball Game (Without Joseph, Careco, Tommy, DeShazer, LaPrince, Morales, or Darnell) (Paul- Sister Mary, Ron)
  Principal Lankenstein suspends Coach Hines after he constantly interrupts the school's basketball game with threats and insults to the players, the referee, and the audience.
  
  1107 Coach Hines: Bus Ride (Without Joseph, Lankenstein, Careco, Tommy, DeShazer, LaPrince, Morales, or Darnell) (Daniele- Ms. Slattery, Nicole RJ)
  Coach Hines, while driving the bus home from a game, makes inappropriate comments to a woman who is giving the basketball team tips on how to be nicer to women. He gets arrested for screaming at people through the window and driving recklessly.
  
  1119 Coach Hines: Oliver Twist (Without Lankenstein, DeShazer, Careco, Morales, or Darnell)
  Coach Hines is in charge of the school production of Oliver Twist.
  
  1201 Coach Hines: Steroids (Without DeShazer, Lankenstein, LaPrince, Careco, Morales or Darnell)
  Coach Hines finds some steroids in the boy's locker room, and tries to find out what boy is taking steroids. The star of the wrestling team is the culprit, but Coach Hines makes the other boys take the fall.
  
  1207 Coach Hines: Homecoming Game (Without Lankenstein, LaPrince, Careco, Morales, or Darnell)
  Coach Hines preps his team for the Homecoming Game.
  
  1216 Coach Hines: Ice Cream Parlor (Without Lankenstein, Tommy, LaPrince, Careco, Morales, or Darnell) (Jordan)
  Coach Hines is seen at his after school job, and Yamanashi and DeShazer come in and pester him.
  
  1222 Coach Hines: High School Prom #1-2 (Without DeShazer, Lankenstein, Tommy, LaPrince, Careco, Morales, or Darnell) (Nicole RJ- Ms. David)
  Coach Hines chaperone's the prom and winds up getting drunk from spiked punch.
  Coach Hines mussels out a threat.
  
  1308 Coach Hines: Post-Game Press Conference (Without DeShazer, Lankenstein, Tommy, Careco, or Darnell)
  Coach Hines holds a press conference after his team's recent loss, but the questions that he's asked have nothing to do with football.
  
  1316 Coach Hines: Paintball Massacre (Without DeShazer, Lankenstein, Tommy, Careco, Morales, or Darnell)
  Coach Hines teaches his students battle strategies on killing an enemy people by going to a paintball field, but it backfires when the other team is filled with delinquent military academy boys.
  
  1401 Coach Hines: Saturday School (Without DeShazer, Lankenstein, Tommy, or LaPrince)
  Coach Hines comes in on Saturday to teach the students how to respect ladies and be gentlemen.
  
  1406 Coach Hines Confesses his Sins #1-3 (Without DeShazer, Lankenstein, Tommy, LaPrince, Morales or Darnell) (Jeff Probst- Prist)
  Coach Hines confesses his future sins to a prist as he wants to hurt Yaminashi and Careco for pulling tricks on him.
  Coach Hines opens up his deepest darkest secrets to the prist only to find out that it's Yaminashi.
  Coach Hines asks the prist why he doesn't look at him, and drops a whistle on Yaminashi's face.
  
  1416 Coach Hines: Judgement Day #1-2 (Without LaPrince) (New Footage: Erica, Lauren, Keegan- Eugene Struthers, and Caress, Ed Bassmaster, Arden, Matt, Michelle Oyler, Old Footage: Frank Cae- Tommy Hackenjoes, Ike- Lankenstein/DeShazer, Paul, Ron- Ken Vandenberg, Nicole Parker- Divitz, Johnny- Morales, Matt)
  Coach Hines get put on trial and fired for elegidly beating Yaminashi. When he is fired, he reveals that he is really an heir to the Heinz Ketchup fortune and that he never needed the job.
  
  
  Catchphrases:
  
  "I will stab you in the neck with a pencil".
  
  
  Trivia
  
  This was Keegan's most recurring character.
  
  Keegan got his inspiration for Coach Hines from a gym teacher he had in high school.
  
  Even though Coach Hines called Yaminashi Joseph in 1222, in the final sketch, Yaminashi credited himself in his video as Terry.

[whoopiedoo2]

make me puke!

[MysterE]

Yaminoshi or Yamanashi?

[agent000]

The character of Coach Hines reminds me a lot of a gym teacher I sometimes encountered in the high school weight room. Or teacher was named Mr. Ramjug, and like Coach Hines he had a dark-skinned complexion as well as a balding head and a terrible demeanor towards what he considered unruly student behavior. A friend of mine, Scott used to have him for math class. Scott like many punks and otherwise bored male (and sometimes female) teenagers used to get high during a spare and attend class afterwards. He would sit at the back of class, and at some point in the school year, Ramjug singled him out for inattentiveness. He used to stop his lecture and ask openly of Scott if he was feeling alright, call him names etc. Scott used to make it worse by laughing nervously and answering "no" to any accusation Ramjug made about his general condition.

I remember in the weight room, (which I attended semi-regularily during lunch to get a better grade in gym) that at some point I started encountering Mr. Ramjug there. I didn't have him for any classes, and though my sister had spoken of him before, she'd never had anything bad to say. Anyway, the first thing I noticed about the guy, was that although he was relatively short, thin and harmless-looking, he really liked to push his weight around. He'd boast about stuff often, chide myself and others about things, and generally act like he was a real hero. I seem to recall that he always would usually wear bright blue or green sweats along with a tight t-shirt. And when he saw Scott and I in the hall one afternoon, he never stopped giving me grief about our friendship afterwards. As far as I'm concerned, Coach Hines is a very close representation of Mr. Ramjug.

Is there anyone else out there who also encountered a similar type of teacher in their high school years? I assumed that this might not be a mere coincidence but a more a common occurence perhaps (generally speaking).