Go Back   Planet MADtv > Our Database > MADtv Repository > MADtv Transcripts
Register Members List Mark Forums Read

Notices

Reply
 
Thread Tools
  #1  
Old 12/29/2004, 7:05 AM
hellahellalala's Avatar
hellahellalala Female hellahellalala is offline
Goren rules
 
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Australia
Posts: 541
Default Bible Dude: Teen Party (#804)

Bible Dude: Teen Party; Episode 804

Matthew Isaiah Leviticus/Bible Dude - Michael McDonald
Jesus Christ - Aries Spears
Teen #1 - Mo Collins
Teen #2 - Bobby Lee
Teen #3 - Ron Pederson

(The logo for PAX TV appears onscreen)

Voice-over: You're watching PAX, and God is watching you.

(Cut to inside of church, a voice-over speaks while Matthew is sweeping the church)

Voice-over: Matthew Isaiah Leviticus, a young janitor at Cityside Church, was mopping up a holy water spill when suddenly he slipped and was knocked unconscious. (We see him fall down) A train of high octane holy water made its way into his ear canal, making him Bible Dude!

(Matthew is now dressed up in Bible Dude's blue costume, we are shown various images of him flying etc. and words flashing onto the screen while the theme song is played)

Song: Bible Dude, Bible Dude, Gets you into a praying mood (REPENT!), He can soar (ATONE!) through the air, Like the Red Sea he parts his hair, Look out (THOU SHALT NOT COVET!) here comes that Bible Dude!

Voice-over: (As the words scroll onto the screen) Tonight's Episode: "Woe to thee that spoilest and thou was not spoiled; and dealt treacherously and they dealt not treacherously with thee. Amen."

(Bible Dude is now dusting the church when a beeper goes off)

Bible Dude: It's the boss. (He walks to a panel on the wall and it opens to a TV screen showing Jesus) Good morning Jesus.

Jesus: Sup Matthew. Here's the dealio, there's a party going down at 146 Prettybird Lane, and it's a teen party.

Bible Dude: Teens you say, well that spells trouble, and temptation.

Jesus: Wait it gets heavier. These teens don't have any adult supervision there.

Bible Dude: I'm on it boss. (Starts to undo his shirt) Excuse me. (He realises he is undressing infront of Jesus and moves out of his view)

Jesus: Hey man hurry up.

Bible Dude: I'm going as fast as I can Jesus! Cripes.

(Cut to food and soft drinks sitting on a coffee table, which zooms out to three teens dancing to a Christian song about sex before marriage being bad. The song finishes and they stop and laugh together)

Teen #1: Hey you guys, I know we shouldn't, but let's sneak into the Hendersons' kitchen and make candied apples.

Teen #2: Yeah!

Teen #3: Yo, yo, yo, I got a better idea. (He pulls a bottle of wine from his jacket and shows the other two)

Teen #1 and 2: Wine!

Teen #3: I'm starting a cool club right now, to be in it you gotta take a sip. (Offers the bottle to Teen #2) Judah, you first.

Teen #2: But I promised my prayer group I wouldn't.

Teen #1: I'll take a sip, I'm cool.

(Teen #3 starts to open the bottle)

Teen #2: Wait, I'm cool too, I'm really cool. (He goes to take the bottle but stops when a gust of wind fills the room. The three teens look on in shock as Bible Dude leaps into the scene, clutching his bible)

Teen #1, 2 and 3: Bible Dude!

Bible Dude: Hi teens. Judah before you partake of that wine, why don't you partake of this. (Opens bible and reads from it) Isaiah, 30 verse 26: "The oxen likewise and the young asses that hear the ground shall eat clean provinder, which hath been winnoweth with the shovel, and with the fan." (closes bible)

(The three teens all look amazed)

Teen #2: Wow, I never thought of it like that before. I don't ever want to drink.

Teen #1: Me neither.

Teen #3: Wait a minute. That bible verse didn't have anything to do with drinking, it didn't even make any sense.

Bible Dude: Not to you, Satan's best friend. See you in heaven, not.

(Teen #3 takes a drink from the bottle and spits it out)

Teen #3: You turned my wine into water. I hate you Bible Dude!

(He is struck by a bolt of lightning and is electrocuted for a few seconds, before turning into a skeleton)

Teen #1: Thanks Bible Dude!

Bible Dude: Oh I can't take credit for that. That was just God's love.

(The teens cheer)

Teen #2: God is co cool, and the best part is I know that he loves me even though I'm gay.

(Bible Dude gasps, and Teen #2 is then hit by a lightning bolt and turned into a skeleton)

Bible Dude: (to camera) Now that was me.

(The remaining teens cheer again)

(Cut to footage of Bible Dude flying, with the bible in his mouth)

Song: Look out, here comes that Bible Dude!

(PAX TV logo)

__________________
Help keep the 7AM Condo Report in the MADtv Character Showdown

...So long and thanks for all the fish...

There's a tugboat, huh, huh, down by the river dontcha know
Where a cement bag’s just a'drooppin' on down
Oh, that cement is just, it's there for the weight, dear
Five'll get ya ten old Macky’s back in town
Reply With Quote




  #2  
Old 12/29/2004, 10:20 AM
MJB12's Avatar
MJB12 Male MJB12 is offline
BREAKING BENJAMIN
 
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: Centennial, CO
Posts: 1,590
Yay, thanks!

__________________
Member of Caity's Sig Posse
Reply With Quote
  #3  
Old 12/30/2004, 10:59 AM
hellahellalala's Avatar
hellahellalala Female hellahellalala is offline
Goren rules
 
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Australia
Posts: 541
No problemo. Anytime.

__________________
Help keep the 7AM Condo Report in the MADtv Character Showdown

...So long and thanks for all the fish...

There's a tugboat, huh, huh, down by the river dontcha know
Where a cement bag’s just a'drooppin' on down
Oh, that cement is just, it's there for the weight, dear
Five'll get ya ten old Macky’s back in town
Reply With Quote
Reply




Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump
 

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Bible Fight NemesisDesign Cool Links 0 05/07/2007 12:37 AM
[MADtv] Bible Dude Miss Information MADtv Characters 12 09/06/2005 4:06 PM
[MADtv] Bible Dude: Choir Boy and Teen Pop Music (#1011) AngelasBraces MADtv Transcripts 3 06/29/2005 11:37 PM
[MADtv] Bible Dude: Video Games (#1022) newt007 MADtv Transcripts 0 05/31/2005 3:51 PM
[MADtv] Bible Dude: Greed During Christmas (#810) newt007 MADtv Transcripts 6 08/22/2004 11:48 AM

All times are GMT -6. The time now is 1:37 PM.