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Old 06/07/2004, 1:40 AM
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funny_guy Male funny_guy is offline
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Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: New Zealand
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Default Spishak: Mach 20 (#413)

Spishak Spokesman- Pat Kilbane
Ron- Andrew Bowen
Wife- Nicole Sullivan


Ron: So what do ya think honey, do i look like a first rate professional business man?

Wife: Honey did you even shave?

Ron: Twice. Its those damn triple blade razors they just dont give me the close shave i need to make me a first rate professional business man.

Wife: Ron if you dont get a promotion today, im leaving you.

Ron: Its the thoughts(??) of those damn triple blade razors. I wish there was a better razor, a way better one, ya know?

(Spishak Spokesman steps out from behind the shower curtain)

Spishak Spokesman: Well now there is! Spishak presents the Mach 20 with twenty blades we guarantee you the closest shave of your life.

Ron: That could be the edge i need to make me a first rate professional business man.

Spishak Spokesman: It sure could. Watch this.

(Shows an animation of the razor as each blade runs over the face)

Spishak Spokesman: (Voiceover) You see the first blade cuts the facial hair but before the hair can snap back the second blade cuts it again, the third blade cuts it once more, the forth blade cuts it again, the fifth blade goes deeper digging below the first layer of skin to remove the hair follicle, the sixth blade cuts away that pesky second layer of skin where there might be some renegade hair follicles, the seventh blade cuts away six more layers of skin ensuring that hair will never ever grow there. The eighth blade sends an electronic pulse to the centre of the brain which destroys the part of the brain responsible for hair growth and four other non essential functions. The ninth blade gently smoothes out the jaw bone to give your face a more even appearance. The tenth blade removes cavity causing tartar and the eleventh blade starts the process all over again. By the time the twentith blade passes over your face your a first rate professional business man. That promotion is as good as yours.

(Shows Ron with his face covered in bloody bandages)

Wife: Thanks Spishak, you saved our marriage.

Ron: Hmmm?

Spishak Spokesman: The Spishak Mach 20. Coming soon the ladies Spishak Mach 20 for all your most personal female shaving needs.


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Last edited by funny_guy; 08/04/2004 at 1:42 AM.
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