[Frank TV] Episode S02E09: Mocha Latte Frankachino (Aired 2008-12-16)

[Miss Information]

Chuck 'N' Shaq #1
It's time for Chuck 'N' Shaq, the political show hosted by Charles Barkley (Frank Caliendo), and Shaquille "Shaq" O'Neal (Aries Spears). In this episode, if Charles can get off the topic of the fact that he thinks Shaq should retire, Charles and Shaq will talk about US relations in European Unions. To join in on the discussion, Chuck 'N' Shaq have brought in German basketball star of the Dallas Mavericks, Dirk Novinski (Mike MacRae). They judge the members on Charles segment Coco Bird or Knucklehead. First up is Felipe Calderon. They all say coco bird, but Charles says it's knucklehead. Next up is Ben Bernanke. Again, they all say coco bird, but it's really knucklehead. Charles spoils the rest of the results by just saying that they are all knuckleheads, and ends the show. [Intro provided by Frank Caliendo, and Frank as Phil Gilford]

Credits: Frank Caliendo (Charles Barkley), Aries Spears (Shaquille "Shaq" O'Neal), Reginald Ballard (Fuzzy), Mike MacRae (Dirk Nowitzki)

Ozzie Osborne Searches for Pills
Ozzie Osborne (Mike MacRae) searches through his billions of bottles of pills for one specific pill. He finally finds it in the pill pool in his basement. [Intro provided by Frank Caliendo]

Credits: Mike MacRae (Ozzie Osborne)

Indy 5
Harrison Ford (Mike MacRae), and Sean Connery (Frank Caliendo) give viewers a behind the scenes look at Indy 5. In it, whenever the director asks Harrison or Sean to do stunts that are at all physical, they ask for easier ways, like instead of breaking down a door, can't they find a hidakey, or if one of them has to swing to a jeep, can't the jeep just be rolled over to them. Every time they ask, the director just suggests getting a stuntman, to which Harrison and Sean agree. [Intro and outro provided by Frank Caliendo]

Credits: Mike MacRae (Harrison Ford: Indiana Jones), Frank Caliendo (Sean Connery: Henry Jones), Ryan Yu (Steven Spielberg)

Dave Chappelle's $50 Million
Dave Chappelle (Freddy Lockhart) is buying a dog that has captured his heart, but the shop owner warns him that the dog requires a lot of care. Dave thinks he is telling him this because he thinks that he will flake out like he is portrayed in the media. He names the dog $50 Million, and leaves the store, but almost immediately, he gets cold feet and leaves the dog on a doorstep. [Intro and outro provided by Frank Caliendo]

Credits: Floyd Van Buskirk (Pet Store Owner), Freddy Lockhart (Dave Chappelle), Angela Trimbur (Passenger)

21 Ago #1
After another night of awards, in which they didn't win anything, William Shatner (Frank Caliendo), Morgan Freeman (Freddy Lockhart), and Rip Torn (Mike MacRae), all go to a restaurant. When a waiter (Adam DeVine) comes to ask their young girlfriends if they are all over 21 (legal drinking age), and if they have I.D. William, Rip, and Morgan feel discriminated because they were not asked. The waiter obliges them, and asks them for I.D. Unfortunately, they did not bring any, so now they have to prove to the waiter that they are way over the age of 21. To prove it, William says that he's wearing a diaper, Morgan shows his freedom papers, and Rip needs to take Viagra just to ask a girl out. The waiter accepts that they are all over aged, and gets them their drinks, but the men have paid a price, as there women leave because they are all too old. [Intro provided by Frank Caliendo]

Credits: Laura Orrico (William's Date #1), Frank Caliendo (William Shatner), Freddy Lockhart (Morgan Freeman), Mike MacRae (Rip Torn), Adam DeVine (Waiter)

Caliendo Squares: Al Gore
The question is "True or False: The largest building in the United States is The Empire State Building?" Al Gore (Frank Caliendo) answers with a mixture of true and false, because by answering the question, and X or an O will appear in his square, causing more pollution in the world. The man, Kevin disagrees, and gets the square, angering Al.

Credits: Frank Caliendo (Himself, Al Gore)
Archival Footage: Frank Caliendo (Charles Barkley, James Gandolfini, Donald Trump, Paul Shaffer, Phil McGraw, David Letterman, Pat O'Brien, Jack Nicholson)

George Bush's Memoires
George Bush (Frank Caliendo) writes his memoires of his eventful 8 year stay in the presidential office. It is a useless book of information that includes George's learning of margining on his computer, all the times he has files chapter 11, and a section so that people can write about themselves. [Intro provided by Frank Caliendo, as Phil Gilford]

Credits: Frank Caliendo (George Bush)

Al Pacino Gets a DVR
Al Pacino (Frank Caliendo) has just gotten a new DVR, and learns how it works from the DISH TV installer. [Intro provided by Frank Caliendo, as Phil Gilford]

Credits: Frank Caliendo (Al Pacino), John Farley (DISH TV Man)

Close: 21 Ago #2, Chuck 'N' Shaq #2, and Andy Rooney Outtakes
William shows a document that says that he's legally blind, he thinks. An Andy Rooney outtake from the sketch in the previous episode is shown, and Charles wonders who came up with such a dumb idea for the show. [Intro provided by Frank Caliendo, and Frank as Phil Gilford]

Credits: Frank Caliendo (William Shatner, Andy Rooney, Charles Barkley)

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Starring:

• Frank Caliendo (0A/23S/-W/8AF)
• Freddy Lockhart (0A/2S/0W/0AF)
• Mike MacRae (0A/4S/0W/0AF)

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Guest Starring:

• Reginald Ballard (1A/0S/0W/0AF)
• Floyd Van Buskirk (1A/0S/0W/0AF)
• Adam DeVine (1A/0S/0W/0AF)
• John Farley (1A/0S/0W/0AF)
• Laura Orrico (1A/0S/0W/0AF)
• Angela Trimbur (1A/0S/0W/0AF)
• Ryan Yu (1A/0S/0W/0AF)

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Legend:

• (A)ppearance Credit
• (S)tarirng Credit
• (W)riting Credit
• Non-Speaking Credit
• (A)rchival (F)ootage Credit

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