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Old 09/23/2006, 11:59 AM
hungryartiste Female hungryartiste is offline
Fresh Meat
Join Date: Sep 2006
Posts: 4
Default Spoilers. LONG.

pre-apology: i havent watched mad tv in a while, so i dont know character names.. sorry.
opened up with some pretaped clips.. michael mcdonald character goes around exposing bums as fakes.

MM rolls up and rolls down the window...
(SIGN: I'm a Veteran)
"so what war were you in?"
"what, huh? i dont know"
"GOTCHA.. ya fake! hahaha"

another bum
(Will work for food)
"i'll cook you a turkey dinner if you put a new roof on my house"
"what? listen man i'm hungry."

(something about children.. dont remember)
"you don't have children.. show me a picture"
"wait, see.. here's my daughter"
"that came with the wallet"
"I'm in the picture!"
"you photoshopped that"
"I don't have no access to photoshop!"
".. uh hahaha gotcha!" (Rolls up windows really fast and drives away)


next clip is a BET video..
JP is singing to a lady about how it's been a long week and they havent spent any time together.. so now it's time for them to have a romantic night and chill..
...watching him play Madden 06.


clips about some ugly office chick who gets picked on.
she opens a fortune cookie that tells her her inner princess is coming out.
when that happens she floats up in the air, glowing.. only to be set down, and still ugly again. the girl next to her becomes pretty. "What the HELL?!"

happens 3 times.. and finally she becomes pretty.
but gets a baboon's ass.


So the opening monologue begins with Bobby Lee who invites a special guest out, John Cena. John Cena and BL were supposedly in a movie that's to be out oin October, the Marine..

He explains to BL that some of the scenes were cut because,
"well frankly, you scared the crap out of everyone.. "
"which scenes?"
"some of them.. but by some of theam I mean all of them."
"but fortunately, I have those scenes tonight to show to everyone."
"cant you just put them back into the movie?"

more banter.. they get into a fight, culminating with john cena slapping the **** out of BL.. good lord that guy gets a lot of physical abuse. you can see it in the bright red welts shaped like Cena's hand and busted capilaries on his chest..


live skit about 3 ladies from new york who are visiting fort lauderdale.
running gag about being a whore. not much to say as it wasnt that funny.
some convo about waxing balls, was changed to waxing sacks.


live skit about a couple going to a restaurant and witness MM character, Keiko the waiter, coughing on some knives.
"this man was coughing on my knives."
"oh Keiko? he's from a remote island untouched by germs.
his saliva is so potent and sterile, he's reason we're
the only restaurant with an A+ rating."

Keiko approaches unhappy customers, licking their glasses, shoveling spaghetti into take away boxes with his mouth, shoving a man's hands in his mouth to 'wash' them, ultimately ending the skit with keiko vomiting on a characters feet.. to clean them.


Lastly.. the BL cut scenes. takes place in Philippines and he plays a filipino whore who falls in love with an american soldier, John Cena. very Miss Saigon.

Im not sure which direction they'll take it since there were a lot of cuts and pick-ups.. and BL improving his lines with:
"for $7, i give you massage, cut, shampoo.. for 10 i give you blowjob and ipod nano"

anyway ends with John Cena coming back 3 years later.
BL: "A lot has changed. Im married. I have a son, John Jr."
(filipino midget comes out in muscle suit)
JC: "listen, I still love you.. let's have sex in the kitchen."
(they emerge from kitchen)
JC: i dont know where you learned all that.. but wow.
BL: there's something i have to tell you.. I'm a man.
JC: WHAT. but we just had SEX back there.. you have a son!
BL: I pull it waaaaay back.. and things like that just happen in the

more banter. a fight. and BL gets thrown out the window. JC takes his child and walks out. BL emerges "oh well.. ping pong anyone?"
(running earlier gag where he can shoot ping pong balls out of his crotch.)

Hmm.. i think that's it. They shoved us out the studio really fast to make room for the next audience.
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